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Reading Material: Short Ends 2/26/17 — Another Accidental All-McFarland Edition

Does the world need more than one book on the movies of Mamie Van Doren? Hell, no. But I sure do! With Joseph Fusco’s 2010 book already sitting on my shelf, now there’s Atomic Blonde: The Films of Mamie Van Doren to keep it company. First published in 2008, Barry Lowe’s book now is back […]

Reading Material: On the Cheap: My Life in Low Budget Filmmaking

Early in last year’s Alfred Hitchcock biopic (Hitchcock, natch), a reporter asks the master of suspense, “You’ve directed 46 motion pictures. You’re the most famous director in the history of the medium. But you’re 60 years old. Shouldn’t you just quit while you’re ahead?” Greydon Clark had nothing to do with Hitchcock, but I was […]

Blazing Stewardesses (1975)

Al Adamson only made movies like Al Adamson, so why shouldn’t his approach to the almighty sequel be like everyone else’s? Whereas 1974’s The Naughty Stewardesses was a softcore sexcapade, the Blazing Stewardesses follow-up has next to no nudity and, in a veritable 180˚, what little there is doesn’t come from the leading ladies. In […]

Frozen Scream (1975)

Intones the narrator at the start of Frozen Scream, “Immortality? Why would anyone want to live forever in a world like this?” Mind you, because he states this as we see an attractive couple making out poolside under the stars and at a presumably pricey pad, you may be inclined to say, “Me! I do!” […]

Zero in and Scream (1970)

In the department of sexual relations, Mike (Michael Stearns, Battle for the Planet of the Apes) has quite a hang-up: “When a man climbs on top of a woman, she becomes ugly.” (Oh, Mike, you’re doing it all wrong.) He takes out his frustration the only way he knows: through the crosshairs of a high-powered […]

Death Dimension (1978)

Following the previous year’s Black Samurai, a post-Enter the Dragon Jim Kelly re-teamed with schlock director Al Adamson to go all 007 with Death Dimension. They were off by at least six points. Kelly’s police detective lives by the credo, “The name of the game is Save Your Ass.” His captain (George Lazenby, the one-and-done […]

Horror of the Blood Monsters (1970)

Even compared to Al Adamson’s other cheap films, Horror of the Blood Monsters is shameless. A patchwork stitching of new scenes by Adamson; a 1965 Filipino oddity titled Tagani; Hal Roach’s 1940 classic, One Million B.C.; and at least three other flicks, it should be called Horror of the Stock Footage. No matter how many […]

Drive-In Madness! (1987)

Drive-In Madness! doesn’t quite earn the exclamation point it gave itself, but it’s a nostalgic look at an American pastime that was well on its way out when this was made: during the home-video boom. And by “look,” I mean a freeform compilation of vintage coming attractions with pointless interview segments serving as glue. Narrated […]

Nurse Sherri (1978)

Four years before Barbara Hershey infamously got raped by a ghost in The Entity, Al Adamson had it done (poorly) to Nurse Sherri, his attempt at cashing in on the then-popular possession-pic craze. Sherri (Jill Jacobson, The Jigsaw Murders) has the unfortunate position of working the ER when a cult leader (Bill Roy, Black Samurai) […]

Mundo Depravados (1967)

On the night of a full moon, poor Arlene is murdered. One of her socks is missing from the scene, proving we live in such a Mundo Depravados — that is, depraved world. Need further proof? Before the crime photographer snaps his pic, Arlene’s dress is lowered to bare a nipple. Say “cheese,” ya hot […]

The Dynamite Brothers (1974)

Leave it to schlock director Al Adamson (Satan’s Sadists) to merge the kung-fu and blaxploitation genres with The Dynamite Brothers, marketed as the first movie of its kind to pair a black and Asian lead. Timothy Brown (aka M*A*S*H‘s Spearchucker) is Stud Brown, “the black cat from Watts,” while Alan Tang is Larry Chin, “the […]

Black Samurai (1976)

Al Adamson movies often mean slapdash editing, piss-poor blocking and lots of offscreen overdubs. Black Samurai has all that, plus Enter the Dragon’s Jim Kelly as the most-certainly-black-but-to-be-honest-technically-not-a-samurai Black Samurai. As an agent of D.R.A.G.O.N. (which could refer to Adamson’s pacing problems: “drag on,” see?), Kelly ends his Mexico vacation early when fellow agents inform […]

Policewomen (1974)

Let’s get one thing straight: my penis Despite the plural title of Policewomen, Crown International Pictures’ playful drive-in actioner is really about a singular police woman, and it’s not Sgt. Pepper Anderson. It’s Lacy Bond (Sondra Currie, star of Al Adamson’s rape-revenge Western, Jessi’s Girls), and after thwarting a prison riot, she’s recruited to bring […]